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Johnny

Johnny-AllStars
Contestant Profile

Secret Story 7 All-Stars - Battle Royale

Placement 7/18 ▲
Popularity 4.55%
HoH(s) held 1
PoV(s) held 0
Challenge(s) Won 3
Faced Evictions 7
Vote(s) Against 12
Day(s) Lasted 86

Johnny-S6
Contestant Profile

Secret Story 6 - Heaven & Hell

Placement 8/16
Popularity 17.36%
HoH(s) held 2
PoV(s) held 2
Challenge(s) Won 7
Faced Evictions 2
Vote(s) Against 9
Day(s) Lasted 65

Statistics of Johnny
Seasons competed 2
Average Popularity 10.04%
Total HoHs 3
Total PoVs 2
Total Challenges 10
Total Nominations 9
Total Votes 21
Total Days 151

Johnny is a two-time Secret Story player appearing in the sixth season of the ORG and appearing next season as an All-Star. Known for his dominance in Limbo and in challenges, Johnny failed to survive the Jury phase of the game. He's also recognized for several and many of his long confessionals made during the game.

Secret Story 7 All-Stars - Battle Royale Edit

Johnny was one of the 18 returning All-Stars in Secret Story 7 All-Stars - Battle Royale.

Johnny's Voting History
Week Johnny's
Status
Johnny's
Vote
Votes against
Johnny
Week 1 Safe Mikey n/a
Week 2 BotB Winner
(with Marco)
Brian n/a
Week 3 Safe Lucky n/a
Week 4 BotB Winner
(with Patryk)
Refused n/a
Week 5 Immune Patryk n/a
Week 6 Nominated David Brian, David,
Gavin
Week 7 Nominated Gavin Blaine, Cinderella,
Gavin
Week 8 Nominated Ahad none
Week 9 De-throned
Nominated
Sam Blaine,
Sam
Week 10 Nominated Brian none
Week 11 Nominated Isaac none
Week 12 Nominated Isaac Ash, Blaine,
Dallas, Isaac
EVICTED
(Day 86)
Jury
Vote
DALLAS

Confessionals Edit

Click Expand to see the confessionals.

WEEK 1

Third time's the charm, bitches! I'm rolling up in my limo, sippin' booze, ready for another bout after my ugly stint last season. My beard is better and by it, this cast isn't as stellar as I wished. Rest in peace Natalie, Will, Purry, and Jaylen.

So I'm with some New School people representing the era of Salem, which is far better than the old folk. I mean, it's really Salem vs. Not.

So let's take a looksie at this cast and see what the hell I'm gonna do with these people. Will they be insane? Will they be puppets? I mean, I'm no puppetmaster so I'm not sure which I prefer.

On the New School bunch, Ella is perfect to work with for somebody like me. If I just talk to her casually enough she'll be tight with me and she's already pledged allegiance (to the flag of the United States of America).

Marco isn't really the most active, but I know he likes me and he'll be willing to work with me. I'll bring that popcorn-popper to a far enough point if I can.

Dallas and Lucky have an interesting relationship with me... Dallas and I were always enemies that got along well last season and Lucky was the pendulum that swung back and forth between us, ticking until one of us would leave. But I think my ORG code shall hold where previous affiliations rule above new friendships and they'll work with me s'long as I return the favor.

Blaine? Whodat? I've heard of the legendary Blaine but all I've gotten is a handful of neglect and zilch responses to my greeting.

Gavin's cool with me. We were pretty chill when we saw each other recently, and I hope we can roll up to the club for a party later.

Patryk ain't gonna like me because of a negative experience we've had together. I'd love to see him go as soon as possible just so I don't have to deal with these negative experiences. Let's see if we can't turn over a new slate - I mean, that's basically what a returning player season is - to correct your mistakes, right your wrongs, fix what was broken.

And then there's Mikey, who I haven't spoken much to but he seems pretty much on fleec. Oh well.

And fuck it, Marish, I know pretty much everybody is saying how they like everybody and I don't want to be that fucking boring person that's like "Oh, everybody is so fucking nice I can't wait to be besties." And I know I fucking said all that shit so let me go off on a tangent in a new post since this is too much spam as is and spam also sucks. That's why my dad cans spam.

–Johnny



WEEK 6

Looks like the writing's on the wall at this point. I haven't done much and it's hurt me in every conceivable way. If only something could change but nothing will - I'm afraid my time in Secret Story has fallen through my fingers like sand.

–Johnny



JURY SPEECH

My slightly late jury speech (sorry about not doing it at lunch, had a test I needed to do then):

Hello, guys. Honestly, I'm walking into here with an open mind - my opinions will not be swayed by the other jurors nor what I saw (which to be honest, wasn't all that much due to my schedule destroying me, haha). The person who explains in their answers to the other jurors why they deserve to win, the person that truly shows why they should claim the title will end up getting my vote.

But since I figured most of the good material would be taken by the other jurors, I don't really have any questions for you guys. So I'm just going to ask you guys to do one simple task (Ella and Blaine, you two may actually remember this one...)

They say an image is worth one thousand words. So, rather than listening to words you have to say to me, find/make me a picture that shows why you deserve to win. No captions, no words, no explanations. Just one picture on why you played the strongest game.

Good luck and may the best player win. Ciao.

–Johnny



Secret Story 6 - Heaven & Hell Edit

Johnny is one of the sixteen contestants that participated in the ORG's sixth iteration, Secret Story 6 - Heaven & Hell.

Johnny's Voting History
Week Johnny's
Status
Johnny's
Vote
Votes against
Johnny
Week 1 Safe Amber &
Hannah
n/a
Immune TBA n/a
Week 2 Veto Holder Lucky n/a
Week 3 Head of House Eviction Cancelled Exempt
Week 4 Replacement
Nominee
Not eligible Allison, Calvin, Dallas,
Evan, Hannah, Lucky
SENT TO LIMBO
(Day 29)
Week 5 In Limbo
Week 6
Week 7
Returned, Day 51
Week 8 Head of House
Veto Holder
Dallas Exempt
Safe Hannah n/a
Week 9 Nominated Not eligible Allison, Hannah,
James
SENT TO LIMBO
(Day 64)
EVICTED
(Day 65)
Jury
Vote
LUCKY

Confessionals Edit

Click expand to see confessionals.

WEEK 1

Now for the honeymoon period... yay...

–Johnny



So here I am, an atheist, playing a game of Heaven and Hell. How interesting. Everyone's in the honeymoon period where we're all making awkward jokes trying to find places to fit in. It's boring as hell, really. It's been under an hour and I'm... probably already on the outs. That sucks big time. Little communication is being spread amongst the main group. Instead, I'm confident a few alliances are already being formed... and I'm not included in any of them. At best, people see me as someone they don't want to work with. Most of my past game information is hidden amongst aliases... but my own wikia is not. The one with the games I've hosted - the one that Tadd is currently playing. Which I need to remove any trace of immediately. There's likely a large group of hardcore players here. And if there truly is, it may be too late for me. At best, I gotta hope I can somehow win challenges or move to Heaven. At worst, I'll have the medium's curse down in Hell. I know I'm a better player than my record states. I've been swapfucked, placed with shitty people, and gotten overwhelmingly cocky. I need to find a balance and- in a game without tribes- can I find one? Can I harness my will to make a move and my will to go with the majority, and fuse them together? We'll see how it goes. We'll see my game blow up. The question to be answered is, how soon will it be until that happens?"

–Johnny



So I've been working on tracking down a few of these numbskulls. Play hard or go home, that's my motto here and now. I need to work to figure everything out as soon as possible. You see, I'm not a social guy. My shtick will fade soon, and I can't be a friendly jokester for 71 days. I need to get with a group FAST. This will also help me work on who shall be in my ranking for partnership. Tadd, I obviously know about him. Played Big Brother ORG 3 and is currently playing my Survivor: Zambia. He's not the most active of players, he usually just finds someone and sticks to them like glue. Which is great for someone like me - if I can find a #2, they'll be my goat. They'll follow me to the ends of the earth... let's see how that works out. Amber is someone else that's somewhat obvious. She and Tom have played together, and she'll be a very apparent threat. That's good. Tom is also very obvious - he signed up for Zambia just like Tadd. He's been in a lot of seasons of 703 ORGs. He's not a bad ORG player, so ideally if I could get him on my side as a simple meat shield. Calvin and Tadd have played together, Clifford tried to get Calvin to sign up for my ORG. And he and I already made a f2 since he said "I can't wait to be the Satan of our alliance." Yay. But if he'll be a meat shield, I'm satisfied. Hannah has played with a few members of my Season One, Sri Lanka: Alex twice, Clifford once, and Joseph once. She is friends with Alex so, if I can find something that Alex liked to talk about (lots and lots of Woo hate, it seems) then I could be golden with Hannah Tyler, I've seen on 703 ORGs a few times and thought "That guy is epeen." Sweet mangatar, just saying. But honestly, I don't know where his head could be at. We'll have to see with him."

–Johnny



This game is all outta whack. Allison is way overplaying, trying to get everyone to place Calvin at the very bottom. Calvin's tight with me, I believe, so as of now, I don't like that plan. I don't like that plan at all. I've also gotten in with Tadd, who's essentially a goat that'll stick to me like his name was Elmer's. He's a free vote because he's not on a lot- he can't devote enough time to strategizing or anything. Pydo is pretty cool. He seems to like me, we've chatted each other up a little bit. I think that I could work with him pretty well. We'll have to see. Natalie's the fakest bitch out here. She's obviously trying to end the conversation, she's doing her best to hide information. She keeps on changing the subject, damnit. I don't like Tom and Amber. They're fuggin' threats, they've played together, and if I have anything to say about it, they're home the second I get a crack at them. Joey and Calvin's rivalry is BEAUTIFUL for me. If the divide keeps growing, I could effectively force a free vote-off at Joey's expense. Hannah seems nice. I've chatted with her a tad bit, she said I seemed like a nice guy. Obviously, she's not good at reading people because, hehe... I'm not here to be nice. I have to make friends and shit, yeah, but I don't plan on making tight bonds. It's not in my willpower to let myself fall to that, just saying. Dallas... he's... okay. I've said like two words to him in private messages, yet we've been somewhat joking around in the main chat. I don't know what he's planning to do, but I've gotta say - I'd put my money on him to win it, right here and right now. Tyler's got the coolest mangatar in the game. The question is... what will he do? He shares a last name with Tom, and as for me, I've never been involved in these 703 ORG groups so I don't know how tight they are. We'll have to see. Evan's a similar case to Dallas. We've only spoken in the main group, but he seems somewhat sketchy. Like one of those players that covers up their good gameplay with idle threats and jokes. Will Kirby, I guess? I don't watch Big Brother... James, Tommy, do you two even exist? If you spoke, I didn't notice."

–Johnny



Oh wait, that's Tommy. Yeah, he's okay. And I just remembered James. He's kinda cool too. Oh yea, Tommy's the ring pop guy. I forgot I chatted with him. Tommy's got a potential to fit in well with me... with my cultist followers. I'm Coach and this is Secret Story: South Pacific. Wait, then I've already lost."

–Johnny



Damn. I had three rules coming into this game... and I've broken two of them ALREADY... 1. Don't be too active. Such an act proves threatening. BROKEN! 2. Get to know everybody individually. Don't leave anybody hanging. BROKEN! (Though can still be fixed) 3. Be the fan favorite. Remember - victory is only an illusion."

–Johnny



Blood is getting spilled more than every addition to Saw, a wall of squashed mosquitos, and Ed Gein's house combined. Already I've formed an alliance that every member doesn't even know they're in. It's beautiful. I'm doing my best to push for an Amber-Hannah elimination. I can effectively remove the social capabilities of Amber without spilling too much blood, force Pydo and Tom to work alongside me by proving that I saved them, and ensure I get seated in Heaven if Tadd wins HoH. Tadd has already promised to place me there as Calvin told me he would prefer going to Hell because Hell is much, much more fun. And I can't disagree, it's a lot more hectic to be there. And hectic is very fun. Pydo and Tom are effective meat shields to block me as I play a strong under the radar game. Once they're saved, (as I've already told them), I will be able to control them extremely well. At the very least, they'll be greatly interested in working with me. Calvin obviously will work with me. He's also a strong shield due to his great hatred with Joey, allowing me to duck and cover behind the strongest source of dissension inside of the house. In addition, I have mild bonds with Tommy, Dallas, and Natalie which all have potential if I water them correctly. The question to answer is if the correct seed was planted. I don't want pumpkins where my apple tree should be. If I can build up enough friendships while all the while not remaining a viable threat, I can win this. I don't want to make my fans in the viewing lounge cry because I get booted. Since I'm such a great person, yanno? But before I leave, let me make a little poem. Roses are red Violets are blue The House will read the rest Hey y'all, fuck you

–Johnny



The longer the day goes on, the better I feel about my -current- position. I'm cracking enough jokes to seem like a friendly guy, I'm not even attempting to overplay yet (in their minds). I'm secretly grouping people together and no one is even aware of my maneuvering thus far. So at best I'm a social threat at the moment. There's no challenges thus far to hint at my physical capabilities (though I am terrible at ORG challenges, it seems), my history is hidden amongst the crappy alias ORGs and Venezuela which I wasn't a major player if you look at what's available there (even though I caused the biggest upset of that entire game), and I haven't revealed any strategic sense thus far. However, there is something to note... certain pairs are quite... interesting. I have a feeling Joey won't like me soon enough because I'm paired with her worst enemy, though her and James intrigues me. Tyler and Tom NOT together? Whaaaat? Natalie and Tadd... I didn't know that they were overly connected. But I think I can control Tadd pretty easily, judging by how tight he is with a certain player in Zambia (my ORG). Lucky and Tommy... two guys who I have little read on. We'll have to see with them. Dallas and Allison... I think I'll work well with them. They're perty active, like to joke around... if I can get tight with them, I'll easily form a majority alliance and let everyone around me knock themselves down when the time comes. This game is a clock at the moment. Tick-tock, tick-tock, four-o'clock, rock around the clock. Einstein, James Dean, Brooklyn's got a winning team; Davey Crockett, Peter Pan, Elvis Presley, Disneyland. Bardot, Budapest, Alabama, Cr- No? Don't like We Didn't Start The Fire? Screw you, Billy Joel's a god. What's gonna happen? What's gonna work? (Teamwork) That remains to be seen... for now, I just have to cut Amber and Hannah, followed by either James, Evan/Tyler, or Lucky/Tommy. As soon as that happens, I will be able to subtly take control and hopefully not become pegged as a fuggin' threat."

–Johnny



After mulling it over, I've decided it'd probably be safer for me to visit Hell over Heaven. Tadd won't nominate me, I'll be able to prevent any outsiders from winning POV and as a result, keep my plan intact. It's logical, Tadd's in with it, and he'll prevent Natalie from nominating me should she win. So Calvin and Tadd are both in on the plan to send me to hell where I can hopefully prevail. Tadd's swinging Natalie in and we have a potential four-person group."

–Johnny



No Tadd stop; evict Hannah and Amber. Pydo and Tom will follow me, Hannah and Amber won't. Please Tadd don't do it

–Johnny



Good Tadd, who's a good Tadd? You are, yes you are... vote Amber and Hannah out..."

–Johnny



I can't believe the first ORG I feel like I could win... is a Big Brother ORG. Blegh. Amber and Hannah are going home, Tyler + Evan + Tom + Pydo will be a shield and one will go home next, I bet (hopefully one of the former, because the latter likes me). After that, we'll go to-and-fro, ho-gun-ho, sling-sack-show, fro-yo-low."

–Johnny



I'm out of place here. I'm not going to last long. The war will reach long-fought days and I fear I won't survive long enough to enjoy it. Allison remains domineering the house. You would assume such people would prove more valiant against her will... alas, none shall. I can't believe I'm planning this but... if I wish to move along I need to... *gulps* submit. I need to hide underneath her wing. And hopefully some amends can be made. My first point of business... if Calvin loses, I've gotta help evict him. It's the only chance I have. And I won't get a second chance if I fail."

–Johnny



This fight has worked out brilliantly for myself. Calvin and Joey have become bigger targets Hannah appreciates me more due to my usage of humor. Allison appreciates me more for saying id like Calvin out. I'm iffy on how she feels, but I did tell Evan not too long ago that id like Calvin out so hopefully… She's out but if she returns from Limbo that may help me out. I'm in an alliance involving Calvin, Joey, and Hannah, Tadd, and potentially Dallas. We know Dallas is the saboteur tho

–Johnny



WEEK 2

I'm glad of my current status. Hell is great for me because if I don't win, I'm still safe. If I do win, I can chill even more (especially if I win HOH). To my knowledge, I'm seen as a somewhat idiotic jokester. Thinking Fabio, I guess. And I'm fine with that label, especially when I've sent in pictures of my younger self to those who asked to see me... young kids are NEVER threatening in these games. Mwahahaha. It's only a matter of time before Johnny-O hoodwinks these motherfucking mothershuckers. "Here's Johnny, about to reroute and out A few lame louts until they scream and shout For a curse has arrived, a sickening from within He comes silently swinging axes in the wind And he'll lop off the heads of the houseguests Like dogs stab a needle and put them to rest Because he's the best in the west like Kanye West And he'll torment and train them to the tricked-up test For the fire's alive stuck behind my eyes Expect them to burn slowly when I bring out my surprise. Shaken not stirred, stressed with mouths blurred With brains turned to curds I will murder the herd in this hood I was first in Heaven but I'm truly a Hellish figure So I'll let them dissolve amongst their trifling bickers The troublesome trickster will soon ascend this throne His kingdom come, his will be done, for this hundred-day home I'm beary excited to vote off and veto Because these guys are way saltier than Fritos

–Johnny



There's a line right now dividing the house. And no, it's not the Hell/Heaven border. It's the two warring factions. Basically the Seven Shit-Suckers and the Five Fan Favorites. Joey, Calvin, James, Tadd, and I are on the bottom side of things now. Which ultimately sucks. However... one of the Seven Shit-Suckers is shucked and shall be sent from sanity next. Preferably Natalie, so Tadd can be given immunity. Our only hope lies in the journeying javalistic (I made that word up) Johnny. If I prevail in the HoH, we can succeed. Victory shall be mine... but I won't win. I suck at comps."

–Johnny



I'm savage, I'm chill. I'm powerful, I'm still. I'm cool, I'm nice, so perfect gotta say it twice. Yea, I'm kidding. Those are all lies. Except the savage part. Even though Andrew Savage is like the opposite of myself. So yea, definitely in the minority. Lucky came out about it and only confirmed our suspicions that Dallas, Allison, Amber, Hannah, Natalie, himself, Tommy, and Evan had taken arms against the other five of us - James, Tadd, Calvin, myself, and Joey. So we have to do the only thing we can do... send all of those motherfuckers straight to Limbo where I can assure you, they'll be taken out piece by piece. Ah, I love playing with such numb-skulled crackpots. Joey and myself will be largely responsible for this transaction into a seat of power. We'll dominate these challenges that the others are so annoyingly petty at, they're almost not even fun. ALMOST. Yea, I think I've got this game packed up and mailed to the box office with my check on it... however much a normal Big Brother winner earns, I suppose. And I'm all ready to cash my chips in! Joey's going to be a pretty easy boot later on... she's extraneously threatening. Though my potential humor/dominance will prove threatening, I believe I can bypass it if I duck down under sooner or later. Calvin's annoying everyone as well. I have basically no read on James meself, yet he seems loyal enough. And Tadd can be my goat to the moon and back, baby! This fan favorite is about to go ferociously fantastic. And you won't want to miss my run to glory... Ah, we've got the saboteur found, we've got the Mayor found, we know a bodyguard and three townies. We're going pretty well at this point. And since you've missed 'em... going to post a poem as well! Yippee!!"

–Johnny



La la la la la la I trolled. You got no poem. La la la la la la Just close out and go home. (stressed like ho-im. Rhyming with poem. That's art, man!)"

–Johnny



WEEK 3

Yay. Tommy's getting beyond pissy "u lied to me. how ami supposed to trust a liar. " I'm doing my best to comfort him but he's likely to go. Hannah's next on our hitlist, followed by Allison, and the game shall be ours'. Joey will go late in the game, I will arrange that. The whole alliance has drawn a line in the sand and is so obviously cocky about the situation. And now Dallas has gone and revealed a bunch of information to me. And it's worsening everything for my own position. It's time to blow this shit up. I'm here to play, I'm not here to get evicted or whatever the hell it's called. It's time to start tapping into them psychologically. We have the plan to create utter chaos... and we will enact it soon. We will end any hope of that alliance staying strong. Our lies will be our victory. And I will be the herald of the retribution that is soon to come. And their petty feuds will merely be backwater batter to my brash brawn. And they are merely pieces in my game of chess. And they won't even know it until it's far too late

–Johnny



Operation: Pure Chaos is now under way. With the eviction of Dallas and soon-to-follow Hannah/Tommy, Allison will be majorly on the outs. Her only solace will be the hope she can win a challenge. And it will be her only chance once the operation is underway. She'll become so paranoid, she'll blow up her own game. The future is futile for these friggin fuckers. They're falling one-by-one, and no Limbo nor challenge can save them. Joey and I got this under control (and Tadd's helpful too)

–Johnny



I'm in control of this alliance and they know it. So I'm probably a late boot at this rate. Oi vey."

–Johnny



I'm in control of this alliance and they know it. So I'm probably a late boot at this rate. Oi vey."

–Johnny



WEEK 4

I'm done for, fuck my alliance and their shit. They're fighting over a stupid lie someone else came up with, and now I am officially screwed. FUCK. Joey and Calvin are fighting and have officially blocked each other on EVERYTHING. My allies are turned against each other by the likes of Tommy. Joey's going to put Calvin in Hell if she wins which means that I won't be able to win HoH and I'll be the next one out if I can't win PoV. Dallas will no longer trust me because of the lies I've spun to him and openly shattered in the hopes he'd go but Amber quit, of course. I can't stand this shit anymore. My only hope is to win every challenge and the chances of that are beyond slim.

–Johnny



I'm getting put up against an alliance that doesn't trust me at all, since Tommy's got this in the bag and my score sucked anyways. Dallas versus myself... So this is the perfect time to test how much paranoia can affect a vote! If imploding at Dallas and changing screenshots in the main chat is considered paranoia, then we can see the fireworks alight."

–Johnny



Fuckfuckfuck. Now if I reveal Dallas, that won't even save me and Tommy has due evidence.

–Johnny



I still have a small chance of success. The worst part about this right now is Tommy's being so smug, spamming me about irony and how tables have turned. Bitch, just you wait... you'll have yours'. If I get out now, I'm coming straight back from Limbo."

–Johnny



Gosh I could've done that so much better. That was so damn awkward. But here we are : Roses are red, Violets are blue, Fake some shitty screenshots, paranoia will ensue

–Johnny



WEEK 5

By fire, by storm, Over roads unconquered, Taken by the swarm, As our hearts have wandered. By night, by day, Through mist and fog, Keeping them at bay, Amongst their analog. By shadows, by stars, Hidden amidst the skies, Taken to lands afar, From my troubled eyes. By worries, by fears, Wrenched from my grasp, We'll raise a vengeful cheer, From our strengthened clasp. By endings, by slaughters, Of which I have received, Trapped under the waters, Of the lies I've conceived. By fire, by storm, My words hath now decayed, By cold, by warm, I have been left dismayed. By sorrows, by regret, My hindsight still offers, I have paid my debt, And laid inside the coffer."

–Johnny



WEEK 7

This is a message to the VL: Guess who's back? Back again? Your flop is back to lose again. So here I'm chillin' like a villain, spillin' these unwillin' mercy killin's like I'm winning till I'm fillin' on penicillin. I'm probably the most hated person in the house. If I win HoH though... Mr. Texas is goin' out! Sweet home to Dallas. Unless he gets PoV, in which case we lop off the head of Hannah. This is war. And I can't decide whether I'm France or North Korea at this point. So at this point, Tadd and myself need some kind of like alternating HoH streak. If he goes, my only hope is an on-and-off HoH/PoV run. And what are the chances of THAT happening? At this point, it's not about winning. I want in that Battle Royale, dammit! So I'm playing to return. So Marish, make me one of your faves. (I know I am) A house divided amidst itself will not stand. And if we're able to create enough divisions, they'll collapse. We will truly divide and prove conquerers. So I'm basically spamming the poll at this point for Tadd and myself. One of us should win each week, and if we do get Dallas out next, there will be little challengers against us. As they won't be able to nominate us further, and the scarer is scared away. Namaste."

–Johnny



WEEK 8

Let's go back in time When we were merely pests Yet we took the climb To conquer the rest

Thinned the herd a bit Overthrew the boss Until we were all hit And broke off from the cause Yet through it all two survived With power and a chance Our legacy is now revived With beggars in a trance And now the majority's going down Knockin' em out one by one Were afloat until they drowned It's really been so much fun

–Johnny



JURY SPEECH

My vote is as open as Marish’s hatred of bear puns. So, let’s have a little fun right now, why don’t we? Tell me why the other finalist deserves to win with as many bear puns as possible. The better case and the better puns will have earned both my respect and my vote.

–Johnny



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